Just Shine: A Simple Approach to Accepting Your Accomplishments and The Attention That Comes With Them.
This past Spring, I went to a female empowerment brunch (#LuxeLifeBrunch – I can’t wait until the next one) and I learned about the imposter syndrome. I am not going to try to paraphrase the definition, but tell me if this sounds like you?
"Impostor syndrome describes a situation where someone feels like an impostor or fraud because they think that they have duped the people around them into believing that their accomplishments are of a high calibre, but in fact believe that their accomplishments are nowhere near as good as the praise or promotions they are accorded based on those accomplishments". - GeekFeminism
Maybe you can relate to the following:
- When someone tells you how great you are, do you giggle coyly and say “who me?”
- Instead of saying thank-you, do you quickly try to downplay your accomplishments and point out where you could of improved?
- When someone gives you a compliment, do you quickly return the compliment so as to take the attention off of you?
- How about this: do you crack a joke about the process towards your accomplishment, about the struggle, about how you would never do it again because it almost ruined your life……
...Because what you’ve done is not to be taken seriously, right? (I hope you’ve caught my sarcasm).
When I was introduced to this I reminded myself that it’s not the best idea to self-diagnose as a sufferer of any illness or “syndrome”. But it begs the question, “Why can’t I (or anyone) take a darn compliment?” “Why do people work so hard just to deflect attention from their accomplishments?” Is that what they call “MODESTY”?
It seems that young females are more likely to display symptoms of the "Can't-take-a-compliment" Syndrome. It seems like the young women that I observe want to be polite, want to be humble, want to be liked, so, in essence, they dim their light. To me, it's like saying, “I am great. I work hard. But, I hope I am not shining too bright for you. We can still be friends, right? I am not too much for you, right?"
With men, I rarely see this type of behavior. Not as frequently. With my own eyes. I am not going to go into “What society taught girls vs. boys” and that whole spiel. I do know that some men can relate to this as well.
Either way, it’s unnecessary. Just Shine. Meaning: “Just Be. In all of your greatness, your creativity, your beauty, your intelligence, your sexiness…Just Be. Breathe. Take a couple seconds. Use Less words. A smile --a genuine smile --and a simple “Thank-You” is perfect! You are not any less worthy of the accolade or celebration, if you just accept it.
It's okay to just Shine.
If you can relate or you advice, leave a comment below. :)
Obviously, this post was inspired by the metallic dress I am wearing.